Relationships

That's what I am learning about. Relationships. Family...friends...co-workers...landlords...doctors...neighbors...even someone you have very little contact with is still a relationship of sorts. The thing is....I got focused on the bad relationships and let that suck the life out of me. The good relationships - the people that you know would be there for you and support you unconditionally - those are the relationships to focus on. Focus on the good stuff in life and the bad, negative or just plain crappy stuff just sort of disolves and disappears. Giving your energy to the wrong things is physically and mentally exhausting and at the end of the day it gets you nowhere.

A week and a half ago I began having some body aches. And then last Saturday I officially started my Arimidex. A side effect of Arimidex is joint pain. When I am under a great deal of stress my neck and shoulders become tight and extremely sore. I went to the chiropractor twice this week and I'm wearing a lovely menthol scented "Biofreeze" on my neck and shoulders. Now if that doesn't get me a man...nothing will!! Just kidding!!! Hopefully as I go through more self-discovery the stress will leave my body. See....focusing on the wrong things is what brings me down...makes me feel old and unimportant. When I know that's not really the case.

I have a lot of work ahead of me. As I mentioned above - self-discovery. Determining what brought Doris to where she is at this time in her life. What happened in my past that I need to identify and work through and eventually accept and get past. I need to identify the healthy relationships and let go of the negative ones. I need to accept that I do not have to like everyone in this world that I encounter, nor does everyone have to like me. Wow - that was a big statement for me. I used to actually care about what complete strangers thought of me --- what point is there in that???!!!

So if you can't tell, my meeting this week with Dr. Stenslie was an eye opener! lol

I have had Jacob with me for 12 days while Dan and Jenn were on their honeymoon. THIS KID IS AMAZING!!!!! Every day he makes me laugh and makes me realize how blessed I am. I will be lost tomorrow when he's gone to see his dad and new stepmom!!

When you're having a bad day remember to count your blessings. Be happy for what you have - not what you don't have.

A note to my dear friend Charlotte Mason -- You may not be at work physically, but you are in my heart and thoughts always. You are a fighter. I love you!!!

Doris